I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends