it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
