i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
Randomize
