I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Randomize