cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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