I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
Randomize
