can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
I am naked and annoyed.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Randomize
