Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
My life has come down to me literally sitting on an uncrustables trying to defrost it because I’m drunk alone and hungry.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
