So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
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