bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
Randomize
