exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize
