I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
Randomize
