I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
he just fucked me for my cheese..
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
Randomize
