Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
Randomize