That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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