How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
Do you remember whose house we're in?
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize
