i wish starbucks made bloody marys
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
You can't just leave with hair like that
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
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