I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
Randomize
