That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Randomize
