sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
Randomize
