What tipped you off? The sombrero?
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
