Screwed.edu
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
My dad is sitting where you rode me
Randomize
