So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Randomize
