my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
Randomize
