its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize
