not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Can I color on your dick again?
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Randomize
