i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
Randomize
