I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize
