so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
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