I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
