how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
My brain says no but my pants say off.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Randomize
