Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
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