READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
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