all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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