it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Randomize
