JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
I need a burrito and a hug.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
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