Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize
