We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
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