i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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