i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
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the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
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