She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Randomize
