Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
Who wears a wallet chain?!
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
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