I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Randomize
