please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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