A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
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