thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
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Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
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