id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
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