Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
Randomize
