he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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