I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
